Thursday, August 23, 2007

Ten things I hate about my life

  1. People who laugh when I have computer difficulties. I know, it's an occupational hazard, but PLEASE show some empathy when I've shagged my little tail over to your office and found that I'm having troubles too. Surprise: if it were easy you wouldn't have had to call me!
  2. People who swear that the impossible has happened, i.e., Them: "I know you can do a back handspring." Me: "Nope, I can't do a back handspring. Never could." Them: "but I SAW you do a back handspring last spring." ME: You must have seen someone else. Them: "No, it was you, I know it!" As if their being mistaken is a moral deficit.
  3. 13-hour days.
  4. Hurting feet.
  5. Endless humidity. Is this related to global warming?
  6. My honey is WAAAAY too far away.
  7. The fact that I can't count too well.

1 comment:

kayakdave said...

I have a little problem similar to yours.
Somehow, when I was about 14, it got around the neighborhood that I had jumped off the footbridge during what at that time was a recent flood. Now it is true that I was on the bridge at the height of the flood. And it is true that I seriously considered jumping off the SOB. But I never did.
For the last 40 years, a couple of times a year, I’ll run into somebody and they’ll introduce me with “This f**king guy jumped off a bridge into the creek during a big flood!” Sometime it is accompanied with “You should have seen it!”
Christ! I didn’t see it and I was supposedly right there!
At first I always told the person the truth. “No, that was just a rumor that got around, I never jumped off the bridge.” But after years, and telling the same guy 4 times that it never happened I decided to just go with it. What the hell, it’s easier than trying to explain it every time.
So now I’m the guy that jumped off the bridge.